Chapter 4

As it turned out, dying wouldn’t stop suffering. Although she no longer had a sense of touch, or the five senses, or a heart that would shake in moments of sadness, she was still drowned by boundless pain, paralysing her with despair on the ground, wanting to cry and wail. But she didn’t have eyes, and couldn’t shed tears. Whether she banged on the door or shouted loudly, the world was forever filled with a terrible silence, and she could only watch blankly as Chen Man’s life slowly, bit by bit, seeped away. It was far too cruel; even more cruel than if she were murdered.

On the verge of death, Chen Man heard some movement, and, with great difficulty, opened her eyes, seeming to see that person that she had yearned for day and night, still wearing the clothes she had when she’d left that day—that outfit that she’d gifted her, fairly expensive. When she had just received it, she had scolded her heavily, saying she shouldn’t recklessly spend her money, but the next moment, she’d eagerly changed into it, then run out asking if she looked nice or not, and didn’t it flatter her figure?

At the time, Chen Man hadn’t answered; now, she looked at that increasingly indistinct figure, and smiled faintly, opening her mouth, and saying in a voice that wasn’t audible to anyone, “...beautiful, very flattering.”

When the white-clad youth arrived at Chen Man’s home, he stood at a distance, gazing at the building, and faintly knitted his brows. Walking inside, he looped around each floor, and only with great difficulty found Jiang Xichu, who was leaning upright against the wall on the floor, her expression hidden in the darkness, indistinct. The white-clad youth still held a folder in his hand, and taking a glance, he discovered the clear change in aura—Jiang Xichu had somewhat transformed into seeming like a malicious spirit, and he looked again, at the unmoving form of Chen Man’s body.

He opened the folder, and said, in a businesslike manner, “It was just ascertained that the upper department made a mistake; you originally weren’t meant to be in that accident; they mistook your thread of destiny, and in that carelessness, you died. Right now, you’re a new ghost, and at the time, we didn’t discover it, so that’s why you were allowed to so easily escape to the human realm.” Jiang Xichu had escaped, they hadn’t been able to find her, and, on top of that, the underground still had a lot of matters to attend to, so they hadn’t been able to look, and it was only when Chen Man’s spirit had appeared in the underworld that they’d discovered something was wrong. Chen Man was a very rich individual, and her life had been cut short at twenty-eight years old, and looking at it, it seemed very wrong; and therefore, the higher-ups had let him interrogate the issue, and, only when investigating was it found out that not only was Chen Man not meant to die, Jiang Xichu wasn’t meant to either, both of them the victims of the butterfly effect. One single mistake had led to countless other mistakes, which needed to immediately be amended, or in the future, even more people would die.

“If you walk through this door, you can go back to the past; we won’t even erase your memories, as compensation from us towards you; there’s just one matter that I want to warn you against—don’t disturb others’ lives or deaths; you already know which day that accident will occur in front of your office, and which day a girl will lose her boundless life, but you can’t interfere, do you hear me?”

Jiang Xichu stared at him blankly, her face paling, and she said, “I…can go back?”

“En,” the white-clad youth said, carelessly nodding his head, closing the folder, and then emphasised again, fearing that Jiang Xichu might still misunderstand, added, neither expressively nor blandly, “If you interfere, if you save one person, then you’ll owe a life, and if you save two people, you’ll owe two, and you yourself only have one life, so we would take the person you care about the most.”

Jiang Xichu unconsciously looked at Chen Man at her side, her throat narrowing, and she said, “I won’t interfere.”

“En,” the white-clad youth said, in a voice unmoved by emotion, and urged, “go back quickly, don’t waste time; I’m leaving—remember the words I spoke to you.” Saying so, he left, and Jiang Xichu watched his figure suddenly fade away, and she promptly stood up, walking forward two steps, and suddenly, her figure stopped in place, her head turning to glance at the person on the bed.

Chen Man’s two eyes were closed tightly, and her hands grasped that ice-cold urn, which, in the past, she would use her own body’s warmth to cut through; but, today, her own body’s temperature was even colder than the urn’s. Jiang Xichu suddenly twisted her head back around, wishing to not see it again. She followed the white-clad youth’s directions, walking out in large strides, and stood in front of that door that had obstructed her for an entire year, and extended a hand with some hesitance; her hand passed through the door, and, without waiting for her to depart, a great force of attraction came from outside the door, and, without needing her to move, in an instant, she appeared outside the door.

The murky darkness had disappeared, and outside it was broad daylight, and by her side, people unceasingly hurried past, everyone heading to work; it would be nine o’clock soon, and any later and they’d be late, and they wouldn’t have time to clock in. Only Jiang Xichu stood dazedly in the same spot, wearing a new white set of commuting clothes, unmoving for a long time.

A man carrying a briefcase walked past, accidentally bumping into her shoulder, and immediately turned his head, apologetically glancing at her, and said, “Sorry, sorry, are you alright?”

This being bumped into knocked Jiang Xichu’s soul back into her body, and she suddenly reacted, hurriedly shaking her head, and said, “I’m fine, I’m fine.”

Hearing her saying she was alright, that man hurried away, and Jiang Xichu glanced all around, and walked to the edge of the road, not hindering others’ paths; her hands shook, and only with great difficulty was she able to take out her phone, and, only after seeing the date clearly was Jiang Xichu able to feel her heart fall to reality.

April twelfth; two months earlier than when she’d been in the accident.

Having finished looking at the date, Jiang Xichu promptly hurried to the office, the familiar office still in that state; the newly-arrived young Secretary Zhou reporting for the first day today sweetly smiled at Jiang Xichu and said, “Morning, Secretary Jiang~”

“Morning, morning,” Jiang Xichu smiled quickly, and then, without even setting down her bag, pulled open the door to the manager’s office and walked inside.

The young Secretary Zhou was startled, and glanced at Secretary Li by her side, and said, “Manager Chen seems to still be inside, she…”

Secretary Li, having seen it so often that she didn’t find it strange at all, said, “It’s nothing to worry about; probably Secretary Jiang just woke up late today, and forgot her secretary persona; give her a bit of time, and she’ll remember it.

Young Secretary Zhou was silent: “...”

Chen Man was sitting behind the desk, properly lowering her gaze to look at a file, and Jiang Xichu entered without knocking, and didn’t say anything even after having entered, only gazing at her with a chest that rose and fell faintly. Chen Man frowned, and asked, “Did something happen?”

Jiang Xichu unwaveringly watched her face; this moment’s Chen Man appeared extremely healthy, her cheeks still flushed with an abundant redness, and her body wasn’t skin and bones; although she was a bit skinny, it wasn’t the gauntness of sickness, but rather that of her natural state. “Nothing happened,” Jiang Xichu said, her voice croaking slightly.

Chen Man’s intuition told her there was something off about Jiang Xichu, but she couldn’t think of anything that could make her this way; she sent down the file, and cleared her throat, saying, “If nothing happened, why didn’t you knock? Jiang Xichu, you’re a secretary, I’m the manager; you need to show me the proper amount of respect and esteem; no matter how you say it, I’m the leader…hey, are you listening to me speaking?” Baffled, Chen Man stood up, stretching out her hand to press against Jiang Xichu’s forehead, but the instant she pressed her hand there, her waist was embraced; Chen Man, still with an arm raised, went entirely stiff.

Jiang Xichu’s embrace was too strong; she was originally thin, and at the moment being pressed against her chest, she had the sense that she soon wouldn’t be able to breathe, but even if she were to be suffocated to death in this moment, she wouldn’t let out a sound to notify Jiang Xichu. This was only the first time Jiang Xichu had hugged her, and she needed to experience it fully.

Having gone crazy with desire for a few moments, Chen Man was still holding out her hand, and thought to push her away, and ask her what exactly was up; inevitably something had happened, or Jiang Xichu wouldn’t be this sentimental; Jiang Xichu’s forehead was pressed against her own carotid artery, and the vein pulsed regularly, and the instant Chen Man spoke, Jiang Xichu would be able to sense its careful quiver. Chen Man’s tone was very gentle as she said, “What happened? Tell this leader, and she’ll help you solve it as best as possible.”

Jiang Xichu didn’t speak, but in her embrace there was the sound of a soft sob, and the last of Chen Man’s teasing smile disappeared, and she immediately became worried, vigorously asking her what had happened; Jiang Xichu still didn’t answer, her crying becoming heavier and heavier, and she was about to worry Chen Man to death, when she finally rose up, and slapped her palm against Chen Man’s arm, and said, “You didn’t grow up! You coward! No sense of responsibility! Selfish ghost! I hate you!”

Jiang Xichu wasn’t a mild, soft young woman; when she’d been in university, she’d been the main strength of the volleyball team, and with the slap just now, Chen Man’s arm went numb, and hearing Jiang Xichu lash out in a sobbing tone, her mind also went numb.

??? What was she saying? Who was a coward; who was a selfish ghost, what is she hating me for?

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